Thu
Sep
1
SciFi, Sex, NASA, Occult, Cakes, Brownies, Fritos, Gas, Rockets…
On September 1, 1902, A Trip to the Moon, arguably the first science-fiction film, premiered in France. How will you honor the imagination and magic of Georges Méliès on this important date?
Did you know that deep inside the Trinity atomic bomb there was a jar containing a fetus conceived by Marjorie Cameron and Jack Parsons, a founder of the Jet Propulsion Laboratory and the Aerojet Corp?
Now that you’ve have this knowledge how does it affect you?
Eisenhower’s nightmare became America’s reality. The military-industrial complex runs America, owns its media and politicians, and needs to be stopped.
I thought I heard Jack De Cat whining so being a concerned friend I looked for him, but he was fine, all perched on his window seat. Walking back to my laptop I discovered the whining sound to be my belly digesting the two bowls of Raisin Bran® cereal.
Dang, I wish you could lay your head on my big fat soft floppy gut and hear my baby kickin’! I have major gas! I could power a rocket!
“Kick the tires and light the fires!”
I feel like I drank a liter of Pepsi and swallowed a handful of Mentos.
Ladies, when your man is trying to please you sexually and he asks if there is anything new you’d like to try that no other man has done for you, but that you’ve wanted to try, don’t answer with, “Yes, but first let me take a Gas-X ® !”
I thought my nose was so stopped up that the nasal spray I was repeatedly pumping like a battering ram wasn’t able to make its way to the clogged drains, but it turned out I forgot to twist the lid of the bottle. Live and learn.
JL2 strenuously suggested I use Crest® Whitestrips. My smile doesn’t have that Turtle Wax Shine anymore. She’s embarrassed being she’s such a young wife and me being feeble and sickly looking when we’re at one of her friend’s cocktail parties. Few nights ago, fell asleep with the strips in and accidentally swallowed them. I was worried, but it turned into a blessing because now I won’t need that anal bleaching!
JL2 and ESP (formerly E13) love making those cakes in a mug and brownies in a mug, but they say, “Jerry, one cup is enough!”
So the jokes on them, because I got a ceramic 130oz. size coffee mug! I can’t wait to see the look on their faces when I say, “Here’s my cup! Now make my cake!”
Now JL2 and ESP are on this Frito Pie kick! My brother loves them. Have you ever had one? It’s basically Fritos with chili and cheese. How whiskey tango can you get? I think it smells like feet and ass whenever I’m near someone eating it.
